I realized I have strayed from the original goals of this blog; I shall return to the point in the next few days. In the meantime, I wrote a poem about how my insecurities plague my mind, and what the constant battle weighs upon me and my SO (the 'mine' and 'you' in the poem, if you will).
Insecurity
Insults and follies ever tangible,
Clouding the mind with self-hatred,
No vacancy for your kind words, no,
But plenty of space for the irrational
Thoughts that control my perspective -
In my mind, I am nothing but mistakes.
In yours, perhaps different; merci,
But I just don't see that reflection.
Perhaps you're frustrated, I see.
As am I, yet you're different than me;
You can escape my insecurity,
While I am ensnared in self-pity.
I wouldn't implore so vividly,
If only I knew the way out.
Please, have patience, amour
And be the light that sets me free.
For while I may sulk over such,
Even a word can relinquish
The clutch these thoughts share,
And perhaps show just as much.
The cycle is unforgiving to you,
Time is short, phrases are lost.
I beseech of you, give hope;
Pourquoi m'aimes-tu?
Apologies; I shouldn't question
Such endearment so lightly.
I only ask in my plea for help
Against the thoughts I mention.
I pray it's not too much to say,
Nor a burden too large to carry.
You're only so wonderful, mon cher,
And your help is so well conveyed.
Should I not be so haughty as to love me;
Myself that has garnered this much folly?
Or forgive, désolé, and remember
Whose love I obtained so easily?
Je t'aime, but not I and my flaws, too
Still not yet have I conquered this fear.
Of melancholy and failure, yet,
May I see the success inside you.
Merci, you've done ever well
And patience a virtue to have,
For this war is longstanding,
And still you stand to tell.
Merci.
No comments:
Post a Comment